Pencil-mustached straight man, felt fedora, painted tie,
Authored zany slapstick schemes that always went awry.
Funny little fat man, dented derby, checkered suit,
Baby face and boyish voice, he came off cuddly cute.
“Who’s on First?” and “Susquehanna Hats” their best routines,
Honed in burlesque, radio, then onto movie screens.
A thousand belly laughs they gave me, hanging on each joke,
So sad they fell from starry heights to die estranged and broke.